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My story: Choosing an abortion as someone who’s already a mum

Stories  •  26 March 2024  • 4 min read

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“I know lots of women who’ve had an abortion, but very rarely do we read or hear of mums having to make the decision for the sake of their family, which is why I wanted to share my decision.”

A client’s experience of a medical abortion at home (telemedicine).

“It isn’t an easy process to go through, but it made all the difference knowing I had non-judgmental care throughout.”

I found out I was unexpectedly pregnant at a really challenging time for our family when my partner had lost his job. With two young children already, we were faced with a really difficult decision to make.

Having another baby was financially impossible for us, and the strain on our marriage and our family would be too big. Prioritising our family felt like the right decision, even though we felt utterly heartbroken by it. I know lots of women who’ve had an abortion, but very rarely do we read or hear of mums having to make the decision for the sake of their family, which is why I wanted to share my decision to have a termination. It was not something I wanted, but I felt was the only option to protect my family.

I phoned up and spoke to someone at MSI UK on the Saturday; she booked me a call for the following day. I was so nervous, but the advisor was very compassionate and kind. We talked through everything, and she said I would be eligible for an at-home abortion. She booked me a call with a nurse for the Monday evening when I finished work.

The medication was sent in the post and arrived by Wednesday. I decided to wait until Saturday when a friend could have the children.

“Prioritising our family felt like the right decision.”

I was really anxious beforehand. It took a while to get going, I took the first pill on the Friday morning, and then took the second pills on the Saturday at 1pm.

Nothing happened for the afternoon, and I was worried they weren’t working, so I called the helpline and was assured this was normal. I didn’t start bleeding until about 8pm on the Saturday evening. I had cramps, but nothing unmanageable, I took paracetamol and codeine before I went to bed.

I woke up at 5am with a pressure and slight pain in my bottom and felt very anxious as I’d read it was a symptom of ectopic pregnancy. I phoned the helpline and spoke to a midwife for half an hour. I had felt very anxious and a bit scared, but she talked with me and assured me that she thought I was passing the pregnancy. I went to the loo and passed quite a bit of blood, and then went back to sleep.

A midwife phoned me at 11am that day to ask how I was feeling and to check up on me. She asked me how I felt, and whether I still felt pregnant*, and I realised that I didn’t. This was a really strange moment, and I felt both relieved and numb.

“I felt so supported all the way through and listened to as a woman.”

I can’t believe the care I’ve had; I feel so fortunate to have access to such incredible, compassionate and accessible care. I felt so supported all the way through and listened to as a woman. It isn’t an easy process to go through, but it made all the difference knowing I had non-judgmental care throughout.

I wanted to share my story as it wasn’t easy, and at times I felt scared, but the aftercare line is there to help, and the midwives and advisors are amazing. Thank you.

*When talking to someone on our aftercare line, you may be asked if you are still experiencing any physical symptoms of pregnancy. Following a medical abortion, any pregnancy symptoms should improve or resolve in the 7 days after you have taken the second set of tablets. For more information, please read our Medical Abortion Treatment and Aftercare booklet.

Read more abortion stories

Sharing stories is at the heart of ending the stigma that too many people still feel when it comes to abortion.


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