“We have just become grandparents and having a child younger than our granddaughter just wasn’t right for us.“
In this story, a client explains their experience having an at-home medical abortion after becoming pregnant following unprotected sex. They were celebrating becoming a grandparent and, for them, it was not the right time to continue a pregnancy.
My partner and I have been together for 19 years. We were celebrating becoming grandparents for the very first time when everything changed.
“When I saw the positive test, my whole world came crashing down.”
After an occasion of unprotected sex, I took the morning-after pill two days later, believing it would prevent a pregnancy.* The day my period was due, I’d never wanted to see it so badly in my life. Four days after my missed period, I just knew I was pregnant. When I saw the positive test, my whole world came crashing down.
“Life has already thrown us challenges we never expected.”
We have just become grandparents and having a child younger than our granddaughter just wasn’t right for us. We knew our answer. We already have three children, our youngest is just about to start nursery. Only 4 weeks after our third child was born, my partner was diagnosed with FND (Functional Neurological Disorder) with NEAD (Non-Epileptic Attack Disorder). Life has already thrown us challenges we never expected.
“Choosing an abortion was the right decision for us, but it didn’t stop me grieving.”
My decision was instant, but my emotions were anything but simple. I felt sad, guilty and angry that this had happened at all, especially after taking the morning-after pill. Choosing an abortion was the right decision for us, but that didn’t stop me grieving. I had my abortion at home through MSI, and although the information they gave me was excellent, nothing could prepare me for the anxiety of waiting for the medication to work.
“I felt instant relief”
For hours I wondered if I’d inserted the tablets correctly, whether it was taking too long, or whether something had gone wrong. I constantly checked the time, my bleeding and every cramp. At first, I only had mild cramping and light bleeding, and I became convinced it hadn’t worked. Hours later, I felt my first gush of blood and, to my surprise, I felt instant relief. After around six hours of cramps coming in waves, I passed a large clot.
“Remember, you’re not alone.”
Shortly afterwards, my cramps eased almost completely. Mine took much longer than I expected, and the waiting was the hardest part for me. Remember; you’re not alone.
Be true to yourself.
*The morning after pill is unlikely to be effective when taken after ovulation. The most effective form of emergency contraception is the non-hormonal coil or ‘copper coil’.
There are a number of factors that may affect which of the emergency contraceptive pills (Levonorgestrel or Ulipristal Acetate) is right for you – for example, your medical history, weight, or if you are breastfeeding. When you seek emergency contraception, a healthcare professional will ask you questions and assess which method will be the most effective.
Read more about emergency contraception and the non-hormonal coil on the NHS website
Everyone is different, and it is normal to feel a range of different emotions after an abortion. You might feel relieved or sad, or maybe a mixture of feelings. You can access NHS-funded counselling with MSI Reproductive Choices UK before, during and after your treatment – find out more here.
Read more abortion stories
Sharing stories is at the heart of ending the stigma that too many people still feel when it comes to abortion.
