“You truly do not know what you would do until you are faced with this exact situation.”
In this story, a client shares their experience having an abortion and stigma – and why they think this needs to change.
Abortion stigma is a lonely place. There is a multitude of reasons women choose to have a termination. I prefer the word termination than abortion, I think the word abortion comes with a lot of stigma.
Financial, emotional, stability, existing children, work circumstances, the possibility of having to move house. I could go on; these are just some of the reasons women choose this route.
“We made a choice that was in the best interests of everyone we love.”
I can speak personally on this. I sat with my partner and spoke about every which way we could make another child work within our home. What we realised was that it wouldn’t be fair to bring a baby into an already exhaustingly busy home with 3 children. How that would impact our children, our finances, our jobs etc. we are not heartless and careless – we made a choice that was in the best interests of everyone we love. It was not a decision taken lightly.
“It’s time to stop making women feel guilty for a choice they are freely and legally allowed to make.”
What I would like to express is that I used to be that person who said I could never terminate a pregnancy. You truly do not ever know what you would do until your faced with this exact situation. Don’t judge people or make people feel guilty. I have heard the argument that many people try desperately to get pregnant, so people who have an abortion are selfish. That they should have the baby adopted and given to people who long to be parents.
I would tell them to ask anyone who’s carried a child for nine months if they would ever say that phrase to someone. It’s time to stop making women feel guilty for a choice they are freely and legally allowed to make.
The stigma needs to end. We as humans need to do better. You may say you would never choose this option, if so, I truly hope you never find yourself in a situation where you need to.
Read more abortion stories
Sharing stories is at the heart of ending the stigma that too many people still feel when it comes to abortion.
